I have a dream...

Visual Novel Community Off Topic
#1

[size=150]This topic is a tribute to the " Have you ever been in a real relationship before" topic.[/size]

I have a dream. Well, you could call it CLAMP’s dream or Chobit’s dream, a dream that someday I will be able to find my “someone just for me”, and I will be that person’s “someone just for me”. I will love her because of who she is, and she will love me because of who I am. I don’t know how long it will take, but I’m sure I will be able to find my true love someday, somewhere in this small world.
I believe in the immortality of love. Even if your loved one couldn’t be with you, even if your loved one went somewhere faraway, your love would live on forever. Because your love, your feeling remains as long as you live in this world. And, like a seed buried deep in the soil becomes a beautiful flower when spring comes, someday the spring of love will come to you again and your love shall be reborn.
I don’t believe in the theory of destiny. I believe that if a “destiny” really existed, it would give every people the equal chance to be happy, to be success. Never would “destiny” be some kind of judgment based on how rich you are, or what kind of family you were born into. Because of that, I believe that everyone has his/her own part in life where they could shine and give it their best. And everybody will be able to achieve “true happiness”.
I also believe, very strongly, that good people deserve happiness.And I want to be the one who could bring them happiness they deserve. It is my humble source of inspiration and motivation that always encourage me every time I feel sad or tired because of many troubles of this day-to-day life. Maybe I’m not powerful at all and i’m poor, but I know that if I really believe and try, I will be able to bring happiness to many people in this world. And I will also be able to find my happiness.
There is goodness in everyone. If you look into this world you’ll see that the world is made by many person. If you look into one person, you’ll discover a world. Never look down on anyone. Sometime, people are forced to harm each other or even themselves in order to live. That’s a fact. But, we are trying our best everyday to build a world where we can all live in peace and harmony together. A very faraway dream, but I believe that it will come true someday. That is why I shall never stop striving for the better. Even if I fall, I will be able to stand up with a smile. Happiness is, after all, being able to struggle and hope.
I love Bishoujo games and I will tell you why. If you see something and you think it’s beautiful, would you not love it? I think Bishoujo games are beautiful (not all of them of course). They teach me many things about life and love. In Bishoujo games I learnt that one person is capable of bringing happiness to different people, but you can only choose one to be in love with. I also learnt that we can understand and share each other pains, dreams, and hopes. Yes, I believe that we can depend on other people and have other people depend on us, that we can support and be supported , help and be helped, and love and be loved. I think that’s what bishoujo games tried to tell us.

From now on i will quote this post in my Youtube’s profile. Thank you

#2

Well that’s a nice dream :slight_smile:

But the only way to make dreams a reality is through actions :wink:

I don’t believe in destiny or luck and don’t think that you can simply deserve or will “receive” happiness or love. It’s the result of everything you do every day that you will give you this.

So don’t simply think about it, go and make it a reality! :slight_smile:

#3

If you had read Naked sun (Asimov), you would know that happiness comes from isolation. 8)
Maybe you have also seen “Hell is other people”.

Love is just an illusion made by the reproduction instinct.
I mean… if the true love exists… if you are really destined to be with one person. Just imagine how lucky you would be to meet her since he/she has to :

  • be born at the same period (not 300 years later)
  • live in the same country (you have to at least meet him/her)
  • be alive (except if you’re necro of course)
  • …
    The probability is so low that only the “destiny” could make you meet this person. And the fact is that I can’t believe in destiny (not since gundam seed destiny of course :)).

As I usualy say : 6.000.000.000 humans → 3.000.000.000 person of the good sex → 300.000.000 person who have the good age.
Good luck to meet the good one.

And despite that people fall in love… but it’s just because our instincts tell the man to stick his *** in the woman’s ***.

…

Maybe I’ve spent too much time on /b/ because I’ve lost all my faith in humanity now. :lol:

#4

Ah, but gay people fall in love too, even though they can’t reproduce. And people fall in love even if they don’t want to reproduce and never do…

I agree that all that ‘soulmate’ and ‘one true love’ stuff is probably rot in a purely scientific universe. (In a religious or metaphysical scenario, it is easier to imagine that god/gods have intentionally put your match somewhere that you CAN meet him or her.) But that doesn’t ruin love for me. You don’t have only one possible friend in the world, why should you have only one possible love?

People are interesting in lots of different ways. There are lots of people out there deserving of your love and understanding.

#5

That’s one of the reasons why I still have a little faith in “love”.

That’s something we (eroge fans) know better than everyone else :smiley:
I will quote Aeka Shiraki : “Maybe there were other paths you could have taken. Maybe there was another happiness for you.”

#6

But humankind has always lived as a society and their advancement has (mostly) always been directed to enhance their quality of life as a society, so that idea is basically flawed :wink:

The idea of a “one true love” is indeed ludicrous; after all, what are the chances that the girl you just had a nice lunch with is going to have your children and/or be your soulmate? what about the one sitting in the other table?, or that awesome girl waiting in New Zealand???

After all, how many times have you ever been in love? If it’s more than once then the idea is easily proved wrong :lol:

Love isn’t this “magical” thing that simply happens in your life, it can be “created” with any person if the right conditions are met; so people should never be fixated on the idea of the “right one”

#7

Well, what you said is also true, but it’s not enough. Let’s imagine, if you were born as an African child, poor and starving and homeless, have no education and no means to live, what you could do to achieve happiness?
If you have an incurable disease, like AIDS, what you could do -on your own- to be able to live normally like everyone else?
That’s why we need “kindness” “faith” and “hope”. That’s why we need to help other people.
Have you seen “Letters from Iwo-Jima”? In that movie, Japanese soldiers fought against American. The soldiers believed that they were fighting for their country, for their honor but in reality, they were used by the Japanese government. Their actions hurt other people and even their own people. Sometime there are people just like those Japanese soldiers. They are fooled and used by someone else. In that case, can they achieve true happiness?
I know that Happiness has different meanings. It also depends on the person seeking for happiness. But I believe that every single person should care about other people’s happiness. We are all human, if one of us is unhappy, then it means that another can also be unhappy, right?
And don’t get me wrong, I DON’T BELIEVE IN DESTINY, PRE-DESTINY OR ANYTHING LIKE THOSE. But I believe in true love because I WANT it. If you don’t believe it you can’t achieve it, right? Life is short, I want to live it fully. And I don’t think normal love can heal my lonely heart, which has been damaged by many things in this world. That’s why I yearn for “someone just for me”.
Someone who has a heart that could understand and fill my loneliness, someone who can give me the strength to face this world. Someone who will change my life forever¬Ö She will be my true love.

#8

Sartre himself said this:

Basically,it means we can’t live without other people; even if to us, they are hell.“If I exist, in the gaze of the other, then if others fail to see me, I fail to exist”

#9

I don’t believe in destiny and true love etc. I think those terms were created by drunk bards and poets throughout history. :smiley:
I’m more scientific.

We’re just mammals trying to procreate. Evolution taught our species that it is better to stay together.
That way your children have a better chance of survival. Falling in love helps people. After a while two persons bond together and later the “in love” is gone.

I love my girlfriend, but I’m not “In Love” with her. That was 7 years ago. 8)

#10

I think it’s the right time for the final blow.

Read this and lose all your faith in love : http://www.massey.ac.nz/~kbirks/gender/whosdad.htm

Who still thinks he/she is blood-related to his/her father ? :lol:

#11

One’s preconceptions have rather a lot to do with how you read this as an attack on love and faith…

Some people will read it and be shocked that in cases where a paternity test was requested, as many as one in five babies were not fathered by the person they were ‘supposed’ to be - indicating that some women have been sleeping around.

Some people will read it and be shocked that in cases where a paternity test was requested, as many as four in five babies were fathered by EXACTLY who they were ‘supposed’ to be - indicating that some men are insanely paranoid and throwing wild accusations.

#12

Yes we will all see what we want to see in this article.

What I see is that 10% of the babies (in EU and in US) are not blood related to their father.
So it means that probably something like 1 woman out of 3 has cheated on her husband (since a cheating woman won’t become pregnant everytime… I hope lol).

It doesn’t say how many men cheat on their wife but it’s probably the same.

In a way… you could say that it’s not related to the feeling of “love” a woman has for her husband since as they say : “Women are driven by primitive urges to seek the optimum genes for their children”, and “the tendency for women to shop around for the best genes”.

Nevertheless it’s really depressing. :?
You can find the same kind of lame excuses for the behaviour of the cheating men, but it doesn’t change the fact that you can’t trust anymore your lover.

#13

goodgenes is apoint of view though . after all studies have shown intelligence is to a degree gentic . the environment part matters too after all its mainly a problem in lower income couples I see. which makes sense because money and power can be just asa attractive as brawn in fact after acertain point they would be more important.

#14

Part of my point is that it’s really difficult to get even an estimate of what the actual numbers are in a ‘normal’ relationship, because the only way you can generally find out there’s a problem is if you actually do a paternity test (which is usually only done if there was reason to THINK there was cheating going on) or in a rare few cases where it comes up in a medical context… if, for instance, you’re looking at family records in order to try and find donors and discover that something doesn’t add up.

Without being able to look at the exact studies, you have to be awfully careful of sweeping statements. The 20% I referred to, I know what they were studying and how they got those numbers, and they don’t really compare to the general public. None of the things on that page really seem to provide data on their estimate of 10% in the general population… unless I missed it.

Some people are wrong about who their father is. Some people are wrong about who their mother is (there have been famous cases where people have found out that their mother is actually their grandmother, because their ‘sister’ was very young when she got pregnant, so the family covered it up). Some people are adopted and never told. Some people were fathered by their mother’s ex-boyfriend rather than the man she later married, and just never told. Some people were fathered by their mother’s rapist, and her husband claimed the child to save it from shame. Life is complicated.

But yeah, statistics tend to show that both men and women cheat a lot. I don’t have the statistics handy so I don’t want to say anything stupid. I think it’s higher for men, but on the other hand ISTR that at least in one sociology class it was suggested that women who cheated were more likely to end the first relationship, whereas men were more likely to stay in it after cheating… Which would allow them to cheat more times in the first relationship and therefore skew the statistics. Who knows?

#15

That’s just ridiculous… :?

#16

It depends how old is the kid I guess.
If he is 10 year old when you learn he is not yours, you can’t say “ha sorry your not my real son. Goodbye.”.

#17

Yeah, it is bad for the kid.

But I would not want to stay if I found out that my GF cheated on me and also used me to raise a kid that isn’t mine. I would be furious.

#18

It really depends on the situation, there aren’t hard-and-fast rules on this sort of thing.

There’s a big difference between:

“I’ve been married ten years and for the entire ten years my ‘wife’ has been sleeping with another man behind my back! He even fathered ‘our’ child and she knew it and she only stays with me to leech off my money!”

and

“I’ve been married ten years and I just found out that at the bachelorette party before we got married my wife ended up in bed with a male stripper and unknown to her our child isn’t actually mine…”

Obviously neither of these scenarios is real, and you could make up dozens of different ones with different amounts of blame to go around. At least in my opinion, it makes a difference whether someone intended to deceive, and whether it was a one-time mistake or a pattern of behavior. Certainly, if I find out my partner’s cheated on me once, even if it was years ago before we were married, I’m going to become massively paranoid and try to find out if they’ve done it more than once. If I find out I’ve been lied to repeatedly, that’s going to be a deal-breaker.

But if my partner simply did something stupid once a long time ago, I could forgive that, with enough time and apologies to deal with the fallout. Having been stupid long ago doesn’t negate all the years we’ve had together that were good.

#19

In that case he should have told you years ago… :wink: :smiley:

#20

Even in that sense it’s not nessasarily true. Many religions and cultures have/do not go by the one-man/one-woman ideology, for various reasons.