My real name is Bonehead. Some call me dumbass.
I’m not kidding.
I have several nicknames, so here goes:
scuddman:
As a basketball player during junior high there was all this talk of scudd and patriot missiles during the Gulf War with Iraq. I had a shirt that had a picture on a rocket on it. One day during my weekly practice I was wearing the shirt and showing off my new bank shot. That was the “Scudd” shot. I became the “Scuddman”, and our center was the “patriot missile” when he packed my ass during the scrimmage.
The LawnMower Man: Many times I missed basketball practice because I had to do chores or had to do something or other. I remember when my friends and I asked my Dad to let me go to a game and he refused, saying, “No, you have to go lawn the mow.” We fell on our sides and cracked up.
"Go Lawn the Mow, Lawnmower Man!"
Bonehead: This name came from Rick Dees on 102.7 Kiis FM in LA, he has a bonehead song for people who do boneheaded things. I truly am a cursed bonehead. I have broken keys on doorknobs. I have destroyed lamps trying to turn them off (Clockwise! No, your OTHER clockwise…no no.aahhh…dumbass! You broke my lamp!). I have crashed the playstation, my roommate’s computers, my computer, the TV, the VCR, the Radio (Dude…you killed the radio…What the fuck are you?) the dreamcast, the Playstation 2, the X-box (Well, it’s made by Microsoft, we figuered you could do it, Bonehead) I have made the CD reader in the dreamcast accidently spin backwards. I have two keys that look exactly alike, one opens the front, the other opens the rear door. I NEVER get the correct key on the first try, it is always the wrong key. I’ve lived in the same apartment for a year…(Man, you are proof that fate exists!) I have destroyed entire tables by just putting my hands on them. One of my friends is so scared of my “ability” that he will zealously guard his stuff. I was a violin player for 10 years, and when I asked to see his violin, I’ve never seen such a scared face in my life.
And of course, the greatest sinker of them all: (Bonehead, no wonder you’ll never have a girlfriend, she’d explode if you touched her!) Ouch, harsh.
The main advantage of this is that anything I build could survive a nuclear holocaust. If I build a box that doesn’t crumble when I touch it, it’s hella tuff!
